It's Me

Im Pleased

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Assalamualaikum. Hi again šŸ˜€

Are you okay today? I hope the answer is positve.

So, this time the tittle is ‘ Im Pleased’ . Why ? Let me tell you a story and the history about me .

Bismillah,

Im a girl who will PT3 this year. Im a bookworm and blue lover. Im not really pretty and smart . Im just cute. Im just a normal person that have a pair of eyes, a nose, a mouth , a pair of ears , a pair of hands, a body and a pair a legs .

But im special . Why ? Cause my eyes are small . Small ? Yup, you know what I mean. My eyes looks like i want to sleep. My mother said thatĀ perhaps i had kacukan melayu-cina . I admit that it was fun cause had kacukan. But at the same time, my feelings mixed. Sad, angry , happy . I dont know why.

Since im in standard one, i always ‘diejek’ cause i had a pair of small eyes. Until that time i told my father that i want to make eye surgery cause i hate my eyes so much . And my father told me that he will take me to make eye surgery when im in standard four.

I always asked myself , ‘ why must me got this eyes ? Not others? ‘. But until im standard six, then my father asked me if i want to make eye surgery. I said no. My heart told me to say yes but i dont know why i said no. At first i hate my eyes so much, then until one day, i just realized that actually my eyes are beautiful cause just some people had a pair of eyes like me. And im different than others .

I always ‘diejek’Ā since standard one until now. Did you know how much my heart hurted ? They always asked ‘ Hey, why your eyes too small?’ ‘Are you sleepy’ and so on. It’s hurted me everytime they asked such of that questions. If im running out of patience, i wanted to say to the people that asked the question ‘ Why you ask me? Why dont you ask my Creator? Macamlah kau tu hensem/cantik sangat’. For your information, its take a lot of years to courage myself to get up and ignore what people said about my eyes. Until today, my courage to talk infront of people especially men just a little.

Im still phobia to talk infront of people. Im still phobia to talk with men. Im still PHOBIA. Yes i admit that i can just ignore them and what they talk about me. But im just CANT . I had been ‘diejek’ since seven years old. So how come I can forget and ignore about it just like that. Im not a doll. Im a HUMAN that had feellings .

Im always told myself to not get discouraged if they asked or told about my eyes. Im always motivated myself to just ignore them if they talk about my eyes. Ā I always find ways to told my heart to stay calm.I always tell myself that ‘your eyes is special’ ‘Allah made your eyes like this because He know thats you are very strong enough to face all the scorn.’ ‘Everything that happens, must beĀ a reason. Just be patient’.Ā But still i cant.

“When hardships fall upon you, its not that Allah wants to punish you, rather its a calling from Allah ‘O my slave, come back to your Lord’ “

Yes, im confess that some people dont talk about my eyes. But i HATE SOOO MUCH some jerks people that ‘mulut macam longkang yg tak pandai jaga hati orang’. They think that its easy to erase all the pain? They think its easy to just forget about it ? They THINK EASY ? NO ! ITS REALLY NOT EASY JUST LIKE A PIECE OF CAKE. Because of the species ‘mulut longkang’ like you , people like me lost spirit to life . Many of them just kill themselves.(i dunno if its true or not)

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So, my advice to people that always jeer theĀ others, PLEASE PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU TO BERTAUBATĀ BEFORE ITS TO LATE. To people that always ejekĀ me, i forgive you. And to people who always at my side, who always support me and still want to be my friend eventhough i have a pair of small eyes. Thanks a lot. Im really appreciated it.

Thats all from me. Sorry for being so emotional this night.

P/S : Ā What is ‘ejek’ in english ? It is jeer ? Ā A lot of broken english

Like and comment. Thanks and Bye. Assalamualaikum

 

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